Tag Archives: Spiritual Awakening

AWAKENING TO NEW LIFE

Posted on May 15, 2013 | 1 Comment

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness.  How do you know this is the experience you need?  Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.”  Eckhart Tolle

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Is the urge to grow part of your life?  Are you willing to encounter what is unpleasant in order to make changes that will improve life?  How does positive thinking enhance your life?

Finally, spring is here with a few warmer days, blooming flowers and heavy pollen.  My front stairs and deck have been covered with the yellow pollen of the oak trees in my yard.  Every few days, a new flower blooms and adds color to the yard.  Because I’m not a very good gardener and I’ve left the yard as it was when I moved into the house, I often forget exactly what is there. As a result, spring becomes a delightful series of surprises.

Spring Awakens New Life

Spring is the constant unfolding of new life.  It’s dynamic and color drags us out of the winter doldrums and reminds us of all that has been lying fallow beneath the snow.  The reality is that although nature is tied to this cycle we are not.  We can awaken to new life at any moment, any day.  When we are open to new ideas and experiences, we create a spring with our lives and new things blossom.

What do we feel in spring?  New energy, excitement, freedom, and hope.  Life that has been restricted indoors moves outdoors where there is more space, more stimulation, and more possibilities.

Spring of Life, 2006

Spring of Life, 2006 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Let Go of the Negative and Welcome the Positive

So how can we create these positive and uplifting feelings in our own lives?  We can let go of those things that no longer serve us:  resentment, fear, lack of worth, and attachment to the past or attitudes that keep us from moving forward.

I often write about letting go of fear, but what do we do once we have released it?  Releasing fear creates a space where all things are possible.  We ask for guidance and it will come to us if we are listening carefully to our inner selves.  Of course, sometimes, what we need manifests in the physical world right in front of us.  Are we willing to open ourselves enough to experience the unfamiliar?

To do that, we have to either take a positive view assuming that it will be an improvement in our lives or at least a neutral attitude that allows us to explore the possibility.  There are no guarantees that everything that comes our way will be good, but if we choose to live with a positive attitude, that there may be some good in whatever shows up, we are more likely to experience good.

Find What Is Good in Each Experience

Living with the attitude that life is basically good is rather like experiencing spring or summer year round.  We can live like this when we are willing to focus on what is positive in each experience we have.  Any change we make requires an adjustment and this may seem uncomfortable, but if we aren’t willing to experience some discomfort, we may never move ahead.

For example, when we begin a new relationship, there may be conflicts.  We may feel the other person wants too much of our time or doesn’t want to see us often enough.  Our partner may reflect qualities of the last partner with whom we had a failed relationship, or we may project qualities of that person or a parent onto the new partner.  We may not like the same movies or food.  But we have a choice every time the conflict arises.  We can choose to assume for the moment that this is an opportunity to learn more about ourselves and the other person, and if we can thoughtfully engage in a conversation and try to understand why the issue is a problem, we may be able to create a positive and meaningful relationship.

Let the Light Inside Grow

In the spring, the light and longer days are inspiring as well as the new growth of nature.  The sunlight gives us the Vitamin D we need to feel good, and it makes it possible for us to enjoy more time out of doors gardening, hiking, or playing.  So, it is also worthwhile for us to look for the light inside us.  What are our positive qualities?  When new possibilities appear, do we think we are worthy of a better life, job, or relationship?  Is the light within us a match to this new opportunity?

Loving Ourselves Brings Spiritual Growth

We can choose this moment to nurture and love who we are, to expand the light within and to allow the best of us to blossom.  If we are to grow, it is so important that we are willing to try new things and take risks.  When these things turn out well, we feel better about ourselves, but it is critical that when we take the risk and it doesn’t turn out well, that we applaud ourselves for having the courage to try.  That is a positive thing too.  Applauding ourselves increases the light.

As Tolle points out, each experience we have is an experience we need to have to grow.  We need to value each one, even the unpleasant ones, for this life is our spring.  We are here to learn and grow and expand our energy, and move into the light.  How do you bring the light into your life?  Please comment.

© 2013 Georganne Spruce                                                                      ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles: Dont’s Miss this video:  Eckhart Tolle: Shifting from Negative to Positive Energy, It’s Time To Wake Up,  Are You Ready to Awaken,  

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AWAKENING TO BEFRIEND OURSELVES

Posted on May 1, 2013 | Leave a comment

“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we will ever do.”  Brene Brown

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Are you as supportive of yourself as your best friend is supportive of you?  Do you have the courage to own your own story even if you don’t like it?  What are you willing to do to empower yourself?

I’m glad April is over because I don’t feel so guilty any more that I didn’t complete a project I promised to complete.  It wasn’t anything terribly important.  It certainly wasn’t earth shattering.  I doubt that anyone cared about it but me.  But I’m a person who values commitments and so I’m rather disappointed in myself.

I had joined the event called NoPoWriMo which meant that I committed to write a poem every day.  It didn’t have to be polished and it could be a first draft.  I only completed six poems.  Why?  Well, the rest of life intervened in ways I couldn’t ignore.

Opportunities to do events or publicize my book and preparation for a Release Your Fear workshop that I gave on Saturday took more time than I expected.  A wonderful new friend came into my life with whom I chose to spend some time.  Everything that pulled me away from writing the poetry was really good and more important.

Being More Conscious of Intuition

My error was apparent from the moment I made the decision to do this event.  My intuition said quite clearly, “This will put more pressure on you.  You don’t need to take on one more thing.  If you feel pressured, you won’t be able to write poetry.  You won’t be in the right frame of mind.”  Clearly, I should have listened, but my sometimes overly optimistic self said, “I’ll find time.  It will be a nice way to relax in the evening.”  Hah!

So, I failed to meet the goal I had created for myself.  Although this wasn’t anything that impacted my life in a negative way, it’s a good example of how I used to have too much of a tendency to over commit.  I would get so involved with so many activities and people that I would be exhausted all the time.  This felt like I was backsliding.  As an introvert, I must have my quiet time each day in order to recharge, but for years, I often didn’t leave enough room for it.

Loving Ourselves to Make Good Choices

The damage I’ve done to myself by pushing too hard or over committing is one of the stories I need to own.  I have a tendency in this area to make bad choices because there are so many interesting things I love to do.  But if I love myself, I have to be willing to say no, not only to myself, but to others as well.  Usually it’s easier to say no to myself; it’s much harder to say it to someone else.

Going Deeper to Awaken

Compared to many stories, my poetry experience is trivial.  For example, feeling we failed at relationships is a much harder one for most of us.  It is important that we take the time to understand why it didn’t work and the part we played.  When we can do that, we can learn to make better decisions and choices the next time.  But then, after the analysis and owning our part of the story, we need to love ourselves enough to forgive ourselves, knowing we did the best we could at the time.

At those moments when we are most disappointed in ourselves, can we give ourselves what our best friends would give us?  Elizabeth Gilbert once said, “Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend.”

Eat, Pray, Love

Eat, Pray, Love (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Experiencing Friendship With Yourself

As your friend, you will listen carefully to that voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough, and you will tell yourself about all the ways you are good enough.  You will have compassion for that hurt child within you who sometimes feels powerless to change what makes you unhappy.  You will empathize with your hurt self and reassure that self that things will be better and that you have the courage to seek out the hard answers.  You will remind yourself that you deserve the very best and that what you desire will come to you.

Our best friend

Empowering Ourselves On Our Spiritual Journey

When we hear these things from our best friends, it feels good to know someone cares so much, but when we can say these things to ourselves and believe them, we empower ourselves.  The bravest thing we can ever do is to look inside and openly observe our deepest self.  The next bravest thing we can do is begin the journey to fix what needs repairing.  These journeys may be challenging, but they will be more manageable if we learn to be our own best friend.

© 2013 Georganne Spruce                                                         ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles: Befriending Ourselves, The Art and Craft of Befriending Your Experience, Is it Realistic to Befriend Ourselves, Befriend Yourself 

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AWAKENING TO OPENNESS

Posted on April 25, 2013 | Leave a comment

“It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.”  Erma Bombeck

How much of yourself do you share with other people?  If you don’t share much, what fear prevents you from doing that? Why do you feel you must hide a part of yourself?

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Hiding or Not Hiding

I met a woman some time ago who seems to be a very nice person.  We’ve been in several discussions; yet I know nothing really personal about her except for her political beliefs.  Her emotional life remains hidden.

I have also recently met a man who is so open that I continue to be amazed by the depth of what he is willing to share.  Instead of practically pulling teeth like I’m used to doing with many men, communication with him is so easy.  He just says what he thinks and goes deeper without my asking him to.

Trust Is at the Core of Openness

There are so many things that affect our willingness to be open.  At the core of it is trust, the two-fold kind.  We have to feel we can trust the person with whom we are sharing our stories, and we also have to trust ourselves and believe we have something of value to share.

While it is true that we must use discretion in what we reveal to others, our ability to share deeply with others enriches our lives.  There have been times in my life when I felt no one understood me and no one really wanted to know what was going on inside me.  Those were barren, lonely times because I was surrounded by people who were not comfortable sharing much of themselves, so they really didn’t want to hear about my deeper thoughts and struggles.

However, most of my life I have had at least one best friend with whom I could share anything and who would share anything with me.  Sometimes what one of us thought or did shocked the other, but we were always there for each other whether we approved of the other’s choices or not.  Our trust in each other created an incredible intimacy and richness to our lives.

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Openness Requires Discretion

Of course there are times when it isn’t wise to be open.  Sharing too much about one’s personal life in the work place can be distracting and inappropriate.  If a friend or partner has misused the information we have shared, we need to reconsider the wisdom of sharing so much with that person.  Sometimes we just have to set boundaries in order to feel safe enough to be open.

Once, when my relationship with a man I loved was breaking up, I shared this with a friend, never dreaming she would pass the information on to two women I hardly knew.  They then shared with a neighbor.  Soon afterwards, I walked into the ladies restroom at my spiritual community and a woman I barely knew told me how sorry she was that this man and I were splitting.

I was shocked.  I had told only my closest friends who I thought would be discrete.  When I tracked this back to the source, I told that friend how upset I was, and she was very sorry.  Her perception of how close I felt to her two woman friends was different than what I felt, and when we sorted it out, she agreed not to share my relationship information with anyone without asking my permission.  With this understanding in place, I felt comfortable sharing with her in the future.

Being Who We Are Creates Connections With Others

While we have to be wise about our openness, we also miss so much in life when we are afraid to show others who we truly are.  As I’ve said many times, when I decided to publish my memoir, I had to overcome the fear of being open.  Being that open felt vulnerable, but I couldn’t tell my story in a way that would benefit those who read it unless I was transparent.  It took quite a while to find the courage to do that.

I’m glad I made that decision because my being open has allowed others to open up to me, to share their deepest thoughts and tragedies, to share things with me that they would never have shared with me had we not had the book to connect us.  When we understand that others have had similar experiences, it often helps us to stop judging ourselves and just know that our “failures” are only human.

I like what Tony Schwartz says:  “Let go of certainty.  The opposite isn’t uncertainty.  It’s openness, curiosity and a willingness to embrace paradox, rather than choose up sides.  The ultimate challenge is to accept ourselves exactly as we are, but never stop trying to learn and grow.”

Openness Enriches Us Spiritually

When we truly accept who we are and love ourselves, we can also accept that we make mistakes.  To be open to living life at its fullness, we have to interact with others, explore our thoughts and lives together.  We have to be open to the idea that it is often our mistakes that teach us the lessons we really need to learn in order to grow and become who we truly are.

When we show our dreams to someone else, they may know exactly what we need to make those dreams come true. Openness allows us to connect, explore, and discover “the buried treasure” within each of us. When we do that and open our hearts to each other, life can be oh, so sweet.

© 2013 Georganne Spruce                                                          ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles:   Love:  It’s Not Where You Look But Who You Are – Wayne Dyer,  Do You Worry About What Others Think of You, Initiating Relationships With Honesty, Openness and Directness

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AWAKENING TO RELATIONSHIPS: EMPATHY, Part 1

Posted on March 20, 2013 | Leave a comment

“No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.” Theodore Roosevelt

Intimate relationship

Intimate relationship (Photo credit: Masashi Mochida)

How do you feel when you are able to empathize with one you love?  Does having someone empathize with you draw you closer?  How important is empathy in your life?  Is it a part of love?

It’s spring again and the days grow longer and the light becomes more intense.  On winter’s cold days, I enjoyed curling up under a blanket to read, writing in my journal, or watching a few televisions programs.  But with the Spring Equinox, something shifts, and although March can’t decide whether it’s winter or spring, a few flowers are beginning to blossom.

The light pulls at me and I want to be outside.  Something opens in me—my heart feels exposed and touched by the blossoms and the song of new birds returning to the area.  I want to be the light spreading through the forest.

Edith Wharton said, “There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or to be the mirror that reflects it.”  One way I can spread light is through my words, and today the word that compels me to speak is empathy because I’ve decided to write a series of blogs on relationships and feel it is the most essential quality in a loving or caring relationship.

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Empathy In Healthy Relationships

We have many kinds of relationships with friends, family, lovers, or co-workers, and the quality of those relationships involves several aspects: empathy, intimacy, integrity, and commitment.  In healthy relationships, all these aspects function in a positive way.  They create a meaningful connection, but the lack of empathy always creates separation.  When a therapist friend of mine stated that the main reason for divorce in this country is lack of empathy, I wasn’t surprised.

Empathy is the deep emotional understanding of another’s feelings or problems.  We may feel what the other person is feeling because we’ve had a similar experience or we may be emotionally sensitive enough that we can imagine how they feel.  It is a deeper understanding than sympathy which is merely an intellectual understanding of what the other person feels.

Parents Must Teach Children Empathy

In any kind of relationship, empathy makes it possible for two people to bond in a caring way.  Empathy comes from a loving and spiritual place within us, and it is a skill we hopefully learn as children from our parents’ behavior.  Parents must teach children to identify what they feel and encourage them to talk about what bothers them and makes them happy or angry.  Otherwise, they may withdraw or develop dysfunctional ways, such as bullying, to express their frustration.

I have had the experience of talking with an adult, expressing my anger about a situation, and had them pull away.  One friend even asked me why I was angry at her when I was talking about a situation that had nothing to do with her and where she wasn’t even present.  I came to understand that when people, like my friend, have been reared to believe it isn’t acceptable to feel negative emotion or to express it, they withdraw when those feelings are expressed by others.  They may have the ability to empathize only when acceptable emotions are expressed.

Lack Of Empathy May Damage Relationships

This withdrawal can be damaging to a love relationship.  I had a similar experience with a man who was unable to see how some of his behaviors were hurtful to me and this caused on-going conflict.  He had learned in childhood that the way to be safe when there was conflict was not to express feelings and to physically withdraw.  This behavior may have protected him as a child, but as an adult, his inability to empathize with my feelings prevented us from having a deeper emotional connection.

Empathy Is Essential To Community

I am fortunate to live in a beautiful mountain community where spiritual awareness is at a high level.  Still, I meet people who are so stuck on being right that their narrow-mindedness separates them from the group or community. They don’t see how disrespectful they are.  The problem isn’t that their thoughts or beliefs are too different from the groups’ ideas, but that they have to prove theirs is the only right idea. They create separation rather than connection. They clearly lack empathy.

Adults Can Learn To Be Empathetic

Expressing empathy says, “I care,” and we all want to know someone cares.  It is deeply hurtful when those we love are not empathetic.  Even when we reach adulthood without this vital skill, it is still possible to learn how to empathize through therapy or just retraining ourselves, not only to listen to others, but to listen to ourselves.  We can go inside and learn to identify what we are really feeling and set our intention to become more aware.  Peter Gerlach says that emotions point to a need that needs filling.  If we don’t know what we’re feeling, we can’t fill our own needs, much less someone else’s.

I think Roosevelt was right, “No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.”  Take the time to listen and be empathetic.  This is one of the deepest and most loving ways we may connect with other people, letting them know we understand their pain and frustration.  When we can risk sharing more intimate thoughts and feelings, we may come to know and love each other in profound ways.  Expressing empathy in a relationship may transform it.  We are all One after all.

© 2013 Georganne Spruce                                                           ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles:  Empathy in Leadership: Ten Reasons Why It Matters, Living in Patience with Your Emotional Pain Body – Eckhart Tolle, 5 Barriers to Empathy in Marriage (and How to Overcome Them)

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AWAKENING TO GOOD HEALTH

Posted on February 20, 2013 | Leave a comment

“To enjoy true health, to bring true happiness to one’s family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one’s own mind.  If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will come to him.”  Buddha

English: Holistic health, body, mind, heart, soul

I wanted to write today about the connection between body and mind and good health, but when I read back over a previous post, “Body and Soul As One,” I decided to repost it because, at the moment, I feel it says everything I want to say.  When we love ourselves, we take care of all parts of ourselves:  body, mind and soul.  And when we are ill, we need to take care of the mind, body, and soul.  Even science is now proving this connection exists.

The Body As Container For The Soul

One of the problems I’ve often had with traditional religion is the way it describes the body as a lesser part of our being.  The body is, after all, the container for our soul.  If we didn’t need it in some cosmic sense, we wouldn’t have it.  At this stage in our spiritual journey, we are experiencing a physical life because we need to learn lessons we can only learn by being in a physical body.

If we embrace the idea of wholeness or oneness, then we have to acknowledge that all parts of ourselves are sacred.  Living in a body offers us infinite opportunities to learn.  As a child, I had many illnesses including one that left me with a heart murmur which I out grew by the time I was twelve.  I missed those early carefree years of life that others remember with joy.  What I remember is lying in bed alone reading and designing paper doll dresses, feeling weak and shy and inadequate when we played softball at school and never learning to ride a bicycle.  I remember having a friend or two but never feeling part of a group because so many group activities were too strenuous.

 Awakening The Body And Soul

As a result of this childhood experience, I developed two interests: good health and creativity which I later developed through dance and writing.  Staying healthy became a priority in my life.  As a young adult I began to search for the answers that would allow me to become stronger and stay in good health.  My love of dance was not just about expressing myself creatively.  It was about building muscles on my skinny frame to become strong.  It was also about the mind/body connection.  Having rejected traditional religion by this time, I found that dancing brought me joy and touched my spirit.  At times, dancing was transcendent, my body seemed to fall away and I was all spirit.

Each physical challenge has been a teacher.  Around 1976, I studied with an amazing dancer, Erick Hawkins during a summer dance program at American University.  Having studied Eastern philosophy and anatomy and kinesiology, he had created a modern dance technique that trained the body gently, working with the pelvis as the center of the body, and teaching us to respect our own bodies.

Hawkins in El Penitente, 1930s

Hawkins in El Penitente, 1930s (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

But that summer, I was in distress, and despite Hawkins’ peaceful way, I made a decision I would regret.  I injured one foot simply walking across campus, adding more pain to the tendinitis slowly healing in the other foot.  I was in a dance company and had a performance coming up.  We were short on dancers; I couldn’t disappoint the director.  So, I demanded that my doctor give me cortisone shots which he did, going against his own better judgment.

When I danced, my feet were numb; I couldn’t feel the floor, but somehow I got through the performance.  Afterwards, as I rested and healed over several weeks, I realized I had committed a terrible act of aggression against myself.  I’d somehow crossed a line I’d never crossed before and was willing to abuse myself in order not to disappoint others. This was clearly a signal that something was very wrong with my thinking.  I realized at that moment that I couldn’t stop thinking about the reverence with which Hawkins treated the body even in training.  As I thought about Hawkins and the reverence he had taught us to have for our own bodies, I realized he had been my spiritual teacher that summer.

 Loving Ourselves With Good Health

This experience made me realize that I needed to learn to love myself.  I had created unnecessary suffering and my soul ached. Dance taught me about one aspect of taking care of my body, but other experiences taught me about a healthy diet.  When I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, I found a doctor of integrated medicine who taught me how to use food and supplements to heal. What I learned from him has continued to serve me well over the years to support my immune system, keep my blood sugar level, and sustain a level of energy that creates a feeling of well-being.

It is difficult to enjoy life when we don’t feel well, and while it is important to take care of our minds and soul, taking care of the body is sacred work too.  To deny the body’s needs is just as detrimental to our well-being as ignoring our spiritual or emotional needs.  Although I am middle aged, I’m actually healthier than I’ve ever been, and I believe that is because, in addition to taking care of my spiritual life, I have cared for my body, this precious container for my precious soul.

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 Do you want life to be a dance or a drag?

We have a choice and it’s an important one.  Caring for our bodies makes it possible to do things that feed the soul like walking in the forest, dancing until dawn or jogging through the early morning air with your daughter.  What are you willing to do to make your body and soul one?

© 2011 Georganne Spruce

Related Articles:  Erick Hawkins, Dancing to Our Imperfections, The Mind Body Connection –  Health is a State of Mind, Mind Body Connection: How Your Emotions Affect Your Health

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AWAKENING TO THE SILENCE

Posted on October 17, 2012 | 5 Comments

“True silence is the rest of the mind; it is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.”  William Penn

Do you meditate daily?  If not, do you schedule a certain time to be silent?  What do you gain from incorporating times of silence into your life?  What do you lose if you don’t?

Listen to the Body’s Messages

For most of the first eight or nine months of the year, I had a strange health problem.  What was especially puzzling was that it came and went following no real pattern.  Everything inside my mouth seemed inflamed:  gums, roof of mouth, and throat.  I explored many possibilities:  a new electric toothbrush might have caused the gum irritation, a troublesome tooth was going bad, my acid reflux was irritating more than my throat.  I looked for blisters.  There were none so I decided to go to the doctor.

On the day I visited the doctor, the symptoms were so minor that he couldn’t diagnose it and referred me to a specialist.  The symptoms returned but went away again the day before my appointment.  I cancelled the appointment.  The symptoms came back.  Two more times, I planned to make an appointment the next day, and at both times the symptoms were not there the next day.

Reading the Messages the Body Sends

Not long after this, when I attended a wisdom class, the teacher began talking about the mind/body connection and how the changes in our energy and the energy around us may affect our bodies and manifest as health problems.  When I told her what I had experienced, she said that my body was trying to tell me something and suggested that I do a process where I write a question with my dominant hand and let my non-dominant hand write the answer.  This bypasses the rational mind and connects us to a deeper awareness.

Awakening to the Spiritual Message

After I went home, I took a piece of paper and wrote, “What is my on-going sore throat and mouth about?”  My left hand scribbled around for awhile and then wrote, “Pain is a sign I’m not on track.”  Wow! Not on track!  Everything’s been going great.  I was shocked, but I explored further and discovered there was a problem in my spiritual life.

The message I received was “Love, open your heart to all who need; speak truth and love; teach wisdom.”  Then I asked if I needed to do something more than promoting my memoir and doing Releasing Your Fear workshops and private sessions.  The answer was “Laugh more, fall in love with people.”  Then I asked, “What am I not doing that I need to do?”  The answer was “Be more silent.”

Make Time For the Beauty of the Silence

I don’t know what message I had expected to get, but it wasn’t this.  Then I took a good look at my life over the last few months and realized that although I was alone and writing many hours a day, I was not in silence.  Now, I lie in bed in the early morning more often and listen to the silence.  In that silence, answers may appear, but often I just feel the love of Spirit wash over me.  Sometimes I do actually meditate and sometimes I just sit and watch the squirrels play.

I have to repeatedly remind myself to choose the silence at some point in my day.  Sometimes I forget.  But my heart is opening more as I find time almost each day to brush away thoughts about my “to do” list.  I just stop and feel that moment and its silence, knowing I am in touch with something so much more important than getting things done.  Oh, and since receiving that message, the inflammation in my throat and mouth has not returned and more people have come into my life that I can laugh with.

How did you experience silence today?

© 2012 Georganne Spruce                                                  ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles : A Prayer By Mother Theresa, Eckhart Tolle – Silence and Stillness (video), The Contemplative Earth, Stillness Speaks – Eckhart Tolle

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AWAKENING TO BE SPECIAL

Posted on October 10, 2012 | 2 Comments

“How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.”  Oscar Wilde

What do you strive to be:  a “normal” human being or someone special?  Have you started developing your special talent or are you waiting for someone to tell you you’re capable?

We Need To Feel Special

We all want to be special to someone, don’t we?  While I may laugh at Oscar Wilde’s comment about women, I have to admit that in a relationship with a man, I want to be important and special to him.  I think most women feel this way.  We want to be “the One.”

In our families, we want to know that we are valued by our parents and siblings.  We all need to feel important to someone, but the truth is that no matter how many people think we are special, unless we think we are, we won’t experience that we are special.

Children Need To Be Encouraged To Develop Their Talents

Ultimately, we have to see and respect our own specialness and see that it’s a good thing.  As a child I was very creative.  I designed my own paper doll clothes and wrote stories.  At about thirteen, I wanted to be a dress designer, but my mother discouraged me because that would be too competitive.  At fourteen when I took an art class at school, my teacher characterized my latest drawing of a phoenix amid crumbling and fiery Greek columns as unusual (weird, in other words).  I got the message: art wasn’t my thing.

Fortunately, my mother encouraged me to become involved with drama which I enjoyed and which led me to become a modern dancer.  But no matter what I did creatively, in my family it was more important to be practical.  It was okay to have fun with these creative things, but not to take them too seriously despite the fact that my parents had artistic talent.  What mattered was making money, not following your passion.

Don’t Wait For Other People’s Approval

Eventually, I gave up trying to gain their approval and just followed my own path.  Even if others couldn’t see it, I knew how much work and courage it took for me to become a dancer.  I knew I was special even if others didn’t.  I knew in the overall scheme of things I wasn’t a great dancer, but it didn’t matter.  It made me happy.

You see, my ex-husband saw me as an ordinary person.  He thought my dancing was a childish pursuit I would eventually tire of.  My hard work and accomplishment meant nothing to him because again, practicality was all he valued.  It hurt to finally understand how “unspecial” I was to him.  But I learned a valuable lesson.

We Are Each On A Special Journey

We are each special and unique in our own ways.  Our most precious quality may be something no one else can see, but we know about it and must honor ourselves.  To expect the world to see how special we are may not be realistic.  All we can do is express who we are, and if we are true to that, we will eventually draw to us the people who do appreciate who we really are.

This week two people who are reading my spiritual memoir Awakening to the Dance: A Journey to Wholeness told me that they couldn’t put it down.  One man read it in three days.  It’s nice to know that all the hard work I put into the book is paying off because the point to writing is to move and entertain people.   But it would never have happened if I hadn’t believed I was special enough to do it.  Do you know how special you are?

What gifts have you not developed because you are waiting for someone else to tell you that you are good enough?  Why not take the first step today?  Let me know how it goes.  Namaste.

©2012 Georganne Spruce                                                  ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles:  Wayne Dyer Talks About Being Yourself (video), The Path to Unconditional Acceptance, Our Talents Are Our Gifts – Use Them Well

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AWAKENING TO SEE OURSELVES HONESTLY

Posted on September 26, 2012 | Leave a comment

“The most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.”  Pema Chödrön 

Do you know who you really are?  Do you like who you really are?  Are you willing to take responsibility and look honestly at the changes you need to make?

Self-analysis is a difficult process.  When we look closely at ourselves we want to see the positive: the good we do, our loving qualities, and our accomplishments.  That, of course, is the easy part.  When we start to look at our less than sterling qualities, we usually experience anxiety and may shut down before we even have the courage to open the door.

We Must Look At Ourselves Honestly in Order to Grow

It isn’t very helpful to beat up on ourselves for all the mistakes we’ve made and all the things we don’t like about ourselves, but if we are to grow and become more the person we want to be, we must find the courage to look honestly at ourselves.  Doing this with gentleness, as Pema Chödrön suggests, is the most effective way.

The moment when we are forced to look at ourselves honestly may very well be the most important moment of our lives.  If we are unable to be honest with ourselves, we will not be able to be honest with others because there will always be something we need to hide.   If we are willing to look at the dark and unpleasant side of who we are, then we have opened a door to changing and healing.

It Takes Courage to Make Changes

It takes courage to walk through that door.  Our greatest fear is that, if we change, the people we care about in our lives may stop loving us.  But if we are hiding who we really are, those people can’t love who we truly are; they can only love who we pretend to be.  The idea that we are being loved for who we are is a sham.

Many people in our culture take drugs to hide the pain of not living honestly.  Drugs mask our anxiety or depression and give us the illusion that we are all right.  I once had a friend who was always in conflict with her family; they had very different values.  She took medication for depression and would periodically stop taking it, but she would soon become depressed.  Having spent time being depressed myself, I shared with her the things I did to combat it.  My diet was healthy, balanced, low in sugar and alcohol, and I ate at regular intervals to keep the blood sugar balanced.  I also exercised every day.  I meditated frequently and monitored my negative thinking, reframing thoughts that did not need to be negative ones into positive thoughts to lift my vibration.  Was my friend willing to try any of this?  No? She thought the spiritual stuff was silly, and she tried to eat healthy, but…  In fact, I saw virtually no evidence that she was willing to do anything to change her life.

Love All of Who You Are

The truth is that all the negative aspects of ourselves that we stuff down and hide away cause anxiety, disease and fear.  How can we ever really feel good about ourselves if there are parts of us we must always hide?  Religion has taught many people that they are worthless unless they follow certain rules or that loving oneself is selfish, but in Christianity, the great teacher was Jesus who said, “Love others as you love yourself.”  So, how can we love others if we cannot love ourselves?  If we cannot forgive ourselves our shortcomings, how can we forgive others theirs?

Nurture the Child Within

Healthy parents love their children even when they misbehave.  They encourage their children to tell them the truth, and those children learn that there may be consequences when they admit they’ve behaved badly, but they will still be loved if they tell the truth.  We need to accept ourselves in the same way and tell ourselves the truth.  We cannot grow emotionally unless we are willing to take full responsibility for who we are.  We must nurture that wounded child within who is so afraid no one will love it if they learn who she/he really is.

Change Can Bring a New and Better Life

What I know for sure is that life changes.  As we change and grow, life adapts.  Sometimes, the greatest heartbreak turns out to be the most profound lesson we could ever learn.  Then that lesson leads us in a new direction where we are able to find new friends and a new life that support who we really are.  It is even possible that some of the people who love us now may still love us through the changes.

Steve Marboli said, “There is nothing more beautiful than seeing a person being themselves.  Imagine going through your day being unapologetically you.”

What are you willing to do today to become more of who you truly are?

© 2012 Georganne Spruce                                                ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

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AWAKENING TO SEE THE BEAUTY OF LIFE

Posted on September 5, 2012 | 1 Comment

 

 

NEED TO “RELEASE YOUR FEAR” AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE?  ATTEND MY WORKSHOP ON SEPTEMBER 9 IN ASHEVILLE, NORTH CAROLINA.  CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

 

AWAKENING TO SEE THE BEAUTY OF LIFE

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”  Thornton Wilder

Do you often feel overwhelmed by what you need to do?  Do you run your life or does your life run you?  Are you giving attention to those people or activities you most value?

Nature Enriches Our Spirits

I try to schedule a hike once a week during the summer because I feel such a strong need to be out in nature.  It calms and connects me with Spirit in a deep way.  It’s also a great way to connect with people who also love nature, and since my main hiking buddy was away most of the summer, I enjoyed meeting more hikers.

It’s taken a while to find the right group.  When I first moved to the mountains, the first group I hiked with used hiking as an aerobic activity and went so fast it was impossible to enjoy the scenery and plant life.  Another group only went on lengthy, challenging hikes.  Finally I found a group that fit my needs, but these hikers also move too fast for me at times.

When I hike, I want to be able to see what is along the trail:  the flowers, mushrooms, moss, knarled branches, bright leaves, and small crawling creatures (as long as they don’t rattle).  I want to be engaged with what is around me:  feel the moisture, smell the scents, examine the textures.  The stimulation of hiking through such an extremely bio-diverse area can be intoxicating.  I love getting drunk on its beauty.

Missing Pleasure Through Haste

Soren Kierkegaard said, “Most people pursue pleasure with such breathless haste they hurry right past it.”  Have you ever been walking briskly past an art gallery or clothing store, saw a flash of something colorful, but you were half a block away before you could stop yourself to go back and see what it was that you only partly saw?  Think about how much time we could save if we would slow down and see what was before us without having to backtrack.

In our society, it isn’t just the speed with which we pursue pleasure that limits the pleasure in our lives; it’s the speed with which we do everything.  In many instances, we have committed to more than we can handle well.  We want to please everyone, help everyone, experience everything, and on top of that, time is literally speeding up.  We are now experiencing in one year what we used to experience in five years.  We think the solution to this problem is to hurry more.  It isn’t.

The Pleasure of Being in the Moment

How would we feel if we each took fifteen minutes a day to immerse ourselves in something we found truly pleasurable?  What if we took the time to really touch our partners fully aware of that touch?  What if we focused on the pleasurable taste, color and texture of each bite we eat?   What if, instead of rushing through the book we’re reading, we let ourselves merge with the delicious cadence and imagery of the words?

Rushing all the time doesn’t feel like living to me, and I’m not alone because several friends have made the same comment lately—they just need more time to be and less time to do.  It’s pretty clear that Spirit is trying to teach me how to do this because invariably when I start whizzing around the house at a high speed, I always trip over a chair, stab my thigh on the corner of a table, or spill a pitcher of water.  If I don’t have sense enough to slow down, life will do it for me.

Finding Spiritual Treasures in Our Hearts

To become more conscious, we need to notice when we feel stressed, angry, overwhelmed, or exhausted.  We need to simply stop, take a breath, go to our heart centers and feel who we are.  We need to look around us for the beauty we may have missed.  What’s more important, seeing your child’s smile or cleaning the house?  When we move too fast all the time, we become insensitive.  Anything that gets in the way of our getting the “work” done gets pushed aside, and if that includes people we love, that’s a tragedy.

As Thornton Wilder reminds us, we aren’t really alive unless, at the heart level, we are conscious of our “treasures.”  We have to pay attention and strip away the distractions.  It means we have to leave the party or race track, stop using the alcohol and drugs to give us the high our pleasure-loving selves pursue, and get in touch with what is deep and worthwhile where the deepest pleasures of love, peace and joy reside.  It means we have to give up our obsession with achievement, our need to always be right, and our desire to please everyone.  We have to take time to find our centers, linger in the heart to see what our real treasure is, and prioritize our lives so we have the time to see what really matters.

© 2012 Georganne Spruce                                                                   ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles:  Wake Up, and You Can Help the World Awaken, Awakening the Mysterious Feminine Goddess, How can I Be In the Present Moment – Eckhart Tolle  (video)

 

 

 

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AWAKENING FROM THE HEART

Posted on August 9, 2012 | Leave a comment

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.  Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”   Carl Jung

Where are you looking when you envision creating something new in your life?  Where does the vision start?  What is your secret to manifesting it?

Dreaming From Outside

We all have dreams about what we want in life, but what happens when we try to manifest them?  And what does it take for us to bring them into reality?  According to Jung, it all starts in the heart.  In many instances, we “dream” of what we want.  We envision how our external lives would look with more money, our own business, a new relationship, or a different house.  We may imagine how we would look behind a lovely mahogany desk in a powerful managerial position, or standing in the midst of a major gallery with people all around us adoring our paintings.

But on a deeper plane, what is the core of this dream?  Does it fit with who we really are?  We may not even be conscious of the source of the dream or whether it originates from ego’s needs or from our spiritual source.  When I began studying dance years ago, I wanted to be beautiful like the dancers I saw, and I wanted to stop feeling weak.  Because we had to also create dances in the classes, I discovered it was also a way to be creative.  It fulfilled several needs for me, but most were external.

The Value of Going Deeper

As time went by and my body strengthened, I became more confident moving.  I was able to let go and dance from the heart, and when I did this, an uplifting energy and joy flowed through me.  I was operating from a deeper level.  I began to see the mind and body were connected and how they influenced each other.  The stress from daily life created tension in the body.  The tension blocked my movement and interfered with the flow that was so pleasant.  At this point, I was forced to look inside and awakened to realize the blocks were emotional and mental.  It was this awakening that led me to explore the spiritual practices that would release these blocks at the deepest level.

On the other hand, my experience as a writer has been quite different.  The desire to write tugged at my heart from an early age.  It was not a rational thing.  In fact, most of the poetry I wrote was about the love of nature or love relationships.  The essays I write now are almost always inspirational and initially flow from my trust that what comes from my heart will benefit others.

Creating from the Heart

Whatever we create from the heart level is more authentic because it comes from our spiritual core.  For example, following our passion is a heart activity. It awakens us to all possibilities.   We are most expansive when we open at the heart level where we can envision more than what we are able to view through the rational mind.

The heart has no hidden agenda, unlike the ego.  What we envision from the heart will have a clarity that will enable us to see what we really want to manifest because, unless our vision is clear, we will not be able to manifest what we really want.  It’s much like planting flowers or corn.  We wouldn’t just lay the seeds on top of the ground and expect them to sprout new plants.  We know we must dig into the soil and place the seeds there in that rich, dark place where they will germinate.  In order for our vision to grow out into the world, we must go to the heart where we connect with rich spiritual energy.   When we operate from this awakened place, the emotion that we use to manifest this vision will be genuine and focused and more likely produce what we want in a way that is also for the highest good of all.

Have any of your recent visions originated from your heart?  Were you able to manifest them?

© 2012 Georganne Spruce                                                            ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles: Prologue to Awakening to the Dance: A Journey to Wholeness, Was Carl Jung A Buddhist?, The Spiritual Heart:  Your Inner Treasure, Manifesting Abundance Through the Magnet of the Heart

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